Six-year-olds have life figured out... or at least they think they do. But one thing you probably did know better at that age was what made you happy. Back then, we weren't influenced by societal expectations, the need for status, or the realities of life. So we dreamed big.

We wanted to become singers, astronauts, superheroes, and more.

Now, years later, how many of us are in the careers we dreamed up as kids? Not many.

And that's probably for the best (being a superhero isn't really feasible). But just because we didn't pursue those exact dreams doesn't mean they're irrelevant. When you're feeling stuck or dissatisfied, your childhood dreams are the key to understanding what you're missing.

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Childhood Dreams and Unconscious Desires

When burnout or job dissatisfaction comes from a toxic work environment, the solution is simple: find a new company.

But what if the company and the role are fine, and yet you still feel unfulfilled?

Often, that dissatisfaction stems from suppressing essential parts of ourselves. Childhood dreams, or what psychologist Paul Harvey calls phantasy careers (different from fantasy with an "f"), offer a window into our unconscious motivations.

Harvey explains:

'Phantasy refers to an unconscious process of imagination rather than the conscious one of fantasy. Children often daydream about fantasy careers ("When I grow up, I want to be an astronaut/president/doctor") that embody something they long for or feel is missing in their lives. The phantasy career contains deeper desires or unconscious wishes."

As Carl Jung put it, "We imagine that which we lack."'

This doesn't mean you should abandon everything to pursue a childhood dream of becoming a singer or astronaut. Instead, reflect on those dreams to discover the core elements that lit you up.

My Childhood Dream

As a child, I dreamed of becoming an architect. I spent hours drawing blueprints and even designed what I thought an ideal city should look like.

That dream didn't come true due to impatience, financial constraints, and an outdated education system. But the essence of that dream stayed with me. I've unconsciously brought the elements that lit me up into every job, from software engineering to product management to running a company leading operations for remote teams.

While I'm not building houses, I am:

• Bringing ideas to life: Planning, creating roadmaps, and turning nothing into something.
• Creating spaces where people thrive: Instead of physical spaces, I design virtual experiences that enable remote teams to work effectively. I build environments where people feel safe and supported, allowing them to focus on living and working well.

Every time I've felt dissatisfied in a role, it's because one of these key pieces of myself was being shut down.

How to Rediscover What Lights You Up

Your childhood dreams aren't a literal roadmap, but they can serve as a guide to rediscovering the parts of yourself that need attention.

If you're unhappy in your role, use this dissatisfaction as a guide. Ask yourself which key parts of your identity are being neglected:

1. Reflect on Your Childhood Aspirations: What did you want to be when you grew up?
2. Identify the Core Elements: What key piece lit you up about this dream? (ex. Helping others, problem-solving, adventure, etc.)
3. Apply Those Elements to Your Current Role: Find ways to bring these missing pieces into your work. If your role doesn't allow for it, consider how to bring them into your daily life or explore roles that align more closely.

Childhood dreams aren't just whimsical fantasies, but a roadmap to understanding ourselves. They reveal our unconscious motivations and offer clues about what truly lights us up.

If you're feeling stuck or burned out, take a step back and reflect on the dreams that once inspired you. You might find that the key to satisfaction isn't in changing everything but in rediscovering the parts of yourself you've set aside.

Sometimes, the secret to thriving lies in remembering what made you feel alive in the first place.

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TLDR

Your childhood dreams aren't just fantasies, but the key to understanding what you're missing.

Reflect on what once lit you up to discover what you need now.

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Quote of the Week

- Paul Valery

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In Other News

​How your childhood dreams can help your career​
If you'd like to explore today's topic further, check out this short podcast episode from This Working Life.

​The Secret to Thriving Company Culture
​This was one of the best podcasts I've heard about company culture. Loved this quote:

"To be in a company where people are actually thinking about these things, they first have to think it's possible. People feel like, oh, I can build AGI. I can build a 10 billion company. And then you [ask] so how can we build a culture that's 20 percent better? And they're like, yeah, no, I don't know if that's possible, it's people."

​Our SaaS Start-up’s Equity Allocation, Expenses, and Growth After Eight Years
​I love seeing companies taking non-traditional approaches to how they run their business. This one shared an interesting compensation model:

'We continue to operate Outseta using our "choose your own adventure" compensation model. Every member of our team is paid based on a pay rate of $210,000 per year. Everyone can elect to work anywhere from 1 to 5 days per week. Everyone can also elect to work some percentage of their time to earn equity in the business—on the same terms as our founders.'

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In Case You Missed It

​Just Say It​
Last week, I shared how you can stop missing out on opportunities in 2025. Thank you to everyone who reached out about how this article resonated with you! Check it out here if you missed it.

Work Forward Society Want to meet others who do work differently? Join us in making 2025 your year of less meetings and more real work! Join The Work Forward Society →

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What did you think of this issue? What do you hope to see in the next one? Hit reply and let me know. I read every response. I truly appreciate you taking the time to read this. Hope you have a lovely day! Marissa ​Founder, Remote Work Prep​ P.S. Did you enjoy this issue? Share the article with a friend. Struggling with a remote work problem? Book a coaching call. If you liked this, consider supporting this free newsletter by leaving a testimonial. ​

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